CBI Blogs

Shalom Chaverim.

Several weeks ago, in the final days of November, while standing in line to make a purchase at HEB, I was struck by a thought: “what if I am not ready for October 8^th” and was immediately brought to tears. Just a week before the parents of Tamir Nimrodi had spoken in Tel Aviv’s hostages square as their son marked his second birthday in Hamas captivity since being taken hostage from his IDF base on October 7^th, 2023. The same base where our own son served his 30-month mandatory service until August 20^th, 2023. Tamir’s heart-broken family had been on my mind a lot since reading the article in The Times of Israel where their words were quoted and sympathy for their pain and that of so many others must have overwhelmed me.

Our daughter Rebekah and I talk often of Eviatar David, the shift lead from the café in Hod Hasharon where she worked who was taken from the Nova festival. Eviatar’s posters are all over the city, yet we never hear about his time in captivity. Is he still alive? If yes, will he ever be released?

As I type this blog, we are hopeful as both Israel and Hamas have signed the long awaited and prayed for ceasefire/hostage deal. Over the next 42 days we will learn the fate of those whom we haven’t known for the past 467. Will Yarden and Shiri Bibas along with their two young boys Ariel and K’fir be reunited? Will Liri Albag, Karina Ariev, Agam Berger, Daniella Gilboa, and Naama Levy find safety in the arms of their parents? Will the 32 bodies that we know of be returned to their loved ones for a proper burial? How many of those who were taken alive with be returned to be buried?

If these past 15 months have felt long, I am predicting the next 42 days might feel even longer. I am also wondering if it will never feel like October 8^th. If the closure we have been wishing and praying for isn’t meant for us this time. Maybe our wounds are too large, and our healing will come over years, not days, and definitely, not overnight.

So, back to my original thought, “what if I am not ready for October 8^th?” There has already been so much heartache, worry, and loss. Maybe I am more wondering if I will be able to handle the news to come. Do I have the capacity to learn of more losses? Do I have the strength to be there for my children when they receive the news of their friends? Will I be able to handle the stories of those who survived? Obviously, I have no answers for any of these concerns so, with deep breaths, we will move into the coming days and weeks together.

While Israel is heavy on our hearts and minds so are all those suffering in California as Santa Ana winds continue to make fire season dangerous for residents and firefighters. So much has been lost and so many have been displaced. If you are wanting to donate but want to be sure you are doing so to a well-vetted organization the Today Show has created a remarkable list that you can access by clicking here.

Sending all the wishes for a peaceful Shabbat as we look ahead to a time of peace for all in need.